There are princesses and there are cowgirls, I believe.

And if you're a woman that grew up in Baguio, you're a cowgirl.

I'm a cowgirl, have always been. I can pee in the wide open fields, and heck, you don't have to open the door for me. I can punch as hard as the boy next door, and I always wonder why you carry that heavy pack, when I can do it myself.

I love being a cowgirl, but hell, sometimes, even cowgirls get the blues. I got a big dose of it now, wonder what triggered it?

I loved that book, but never watched the movie.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Even_Cowgirls_Get_the_Blues
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106834/

Feeling sentimental, eww.

http://danilova8288.multiply.com/video/item/3/Ella_Fitzgerald_-_Someone_To_Watch_Over_Me_1950

And by the way I can sing like that when I'm blue. Believe me.

Five years ago I was booted out of my job as editor of a small community paper in Baguio / Benguet, called Cordillera Today.

This, after I had been turned the once schoolpaperish affair (sorry, the truth) into an honest-to-goodness newspaper, without increasing the budget at all—and against entrenched ways of the staff.

After a year, the newspaper was sold to a British national from a small town west of London, who decided to settle in Benguet Province to take advantage of our cheap labor, and set up a small web development studio.

The British guy claimed that I was a “fanatic” for printing anti-war stories and the news analysis by the respected public intellectuals including Noam Chomsky, all prior to the invasion of Iraq in March 2003.

Being a small operation, I had worn many hats and really worked hard to improve that paper. For me, community paper was not equal to shoddy reporting or bad writing, however small the community it served was. I started out wanting to build a community paper that was honest and uncompromising. (Aside from earning).

Such lofty goals and a heavy responsibility not backed up by compensation or even adequate authority! Still, I buckled down to the task--

Every Friday, I’d begin copy editing stories at around 10pm (as late in the week to ensure that they were fresh), and pull an all-nighter to complete the task. I’d write the editorial and lay-out all the pages. 

On Saturday morning, still lightheaded from no sleep, I’d bring the lay-out to the printer, and only leave after ensuring that everything was in order.

Early Sunday mornings, my daughter and I would walk the distance from the foot of Benguet’s provincial capitol (in La Trinidad) all the way to the top of Session Road to ensure that all news stands were supplied with their papers. I knew that it was only in this painstaking way that a community paper would be recognized by the community it sought to serve.

Finally, after a year, when the paper turned into something possible to sell, it was sold (in part) to that British investor who squeezed me out for being a “leftist fanatic”.

As part of his undertaking to turn the paper into less of a left-leaning paper (whatever that was supposed to mean), he wanted me to write an editorial praising the US-led invasion of Iraq in March 2003. I refused.

I resigned from Cordillera Today in April 2003. That same evening, I was hired by Skyland News to write news for the business page. Eventually, I ended up editing the paper for a while. The rest is history.
…………………………………………..

I was reminded of all this again today, when I read a New York Times article today, which I feel illustrates clearly what the invasion, five years ago, was all about:

“Deals With Iraq Are Set to Bring Oil Giants Back”

BAGHDAD — Four Western oil companies are in the final stages of negotiations this month on contracts that will return them to Iraq, 36 years after losing their oil concession to nationalization as Saddam Hussein rose to power. Read the rest here:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/19/world/middleeast/19iraq.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&th&emc=th

Today, countless opponents of the invasion of Iraq have attacked the decision to invade on several grounds:

• questionable evidence of the existence of weapons of mass destruction that was used to justify the war
• the fact that international courts and the United Nations were against the invasion and argued for continued diplomacy
• the fact that the U.S. had other more pressing security priorities in Afghanistan and North Korea, and that the link between Iraq and Al Qaeda was fuzzy (still is)
• fears that the war would further destabilize the Middle East

Today,  we know that that rationale for invading Iraq as a response to 9/11 has been widely questioned, and subsequent intelligence has not uncovered direct cooperation between Iraq and al-Qaeda.

And while we can still debate over whether Iraq intended to develop chemical, biological, and nuclear weapons until today, no WMDs have been found in Iraq since the invasion—this, despite comprehensive inspections lasting more than 18 months

I am so, so glad that I did not choose to stay on with that community paper, which, by the way, is no longer owned by that British national.

Most importantly, after the horrifying events at Abu Ghraib  I am so glad that I chose to leave that newspaper, even if I was (still am) a single mom in dire need of a job to pay the bills.

I am so, so glad that I did not have to swallow my principles and say that the invasion was a good thing.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abu_Ghraib_torture_and_prisoner_abuse),

…………………………………………..

As a young adult, I was inspired by principled and hard-working journalists--who were also such kind and warm women -- they left their indelible mark on my consciousness. So much so that doing unethical things as a journalist would have felt to me like a personal affront to them.

For better or for worse, they've branded my mind with the belief that journalism is sacred and has a noble purpose in society. Today, I really believe people have a right to correct information – and that this can empower them. And I believe that journalists have this power to ask – to demand – answers from those in power and to present this information to the wider number of people -- all with the aim of bettering their lives.

 
Well, I’m a single mom with no support at all from state or family, so I’ve since decided that, I can’t stay a journalist because the pay just isn’t enough.

I've since  figured, I’d rather write innocent (well, a little less bloody) copy for websites and glossy lifestyle magazines.  [I wrote the tagline for a recent billboard in the metropolis that says “You have the power to reinvent yourself. Be beautiful.  – bwahahaha! ]

.............................................

Thank goodness for the opportunity I have now to edit a real estate glossy mag. While it may not be a noble calling, at least—I hope—I will never be asked to LIE about anything (cross my toes) while I cover interiors and buildings, profiles of industry people, and that sort of jazz.

As a bonus, I got to study real estate financing, property laws and other matters that will keep my mind alive. A simple lifestyle magazine would really bore me—

Thanks, Daniel, for the opportunity.

…………………………………………

In two years my daughter enters high school. It will mark the achievement of a milestone. I chose to be close to her during her early years to help her develop a love for knowledge, a confidence in herself, and good study habits.

In exchange I turned down the junkets, the trips abroad and the socializing that could have ensured my rise in some offices. If she gets a scholarship in a good school (Pisay perhaps?), as we have worked so hard for, perhaps finally I can write more journalistic pieces to satiate my burning hunger to contribute my bit to social change.

.................................

READ MORE ON THE INVASION, the war and the failed peace:

Estimates of Iraq War Cost Were Not Close to Ballpark
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/19/washington/19cost.html?th&emc=th

Iraq TIMELINE
http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2008/03/18/world/middleeast/20080319_IRAQWAR_TIMELINE.html#tab1

First Post Photos:
http://www.thefirstpost.co.uk/24149,features,five-years-on

 

 

Consumer appetite erodes quality of life for rich and poor, reports State of the World 2004

Washington, D.C.—The world is consuming goods and services at an unsustainable pace, with serious consequences for the well-being of people and the planet, reports the Worldwatch Institute in its annual report, State of the World 2004.

Around 1.7 billion people worldwide—more than a quarter of humanity—have entered the "consumer class," adopting the diets, transportation systems, and lifestyles that were limited to the rich nations of Europe, North America, and Japan during most of the last century. In China alone, 240 million people have joined the ranks of consumers—a number that will soon surpass that in the United States.

"Rising consumption has helped meet basic needs and create jobs," says Worldwatch Institute President Christopher Flavin. "But as we enter a new century, this unprecedented consumer appetite is undermining the natural systems we all depend on, and making it even harder for the world's poor to meet their basic needs."

 

"Higher levels of obesity and personal debt, chronic time shortages, and a degraded environment are all signs that excessive consumption is diminishing the quality of life for many people. The challenge now is to mobilize governments, businesses, and citizens to shift their focus away from the unrestrained accumulation of goods and toward finding ways to ensure a better life for all."

 

Private consumption expenditures—the amount spent on goods and services at the household level—have increased fourfold since 1960, topping more than $20 trillion in 2000, reports State of the World 2004. The 12 percent of the world's people living in North America and Western Europe account for 60 percent of this consumption, while the one-third living in South Asia and sub-Saharan Africa account for only 3.2 percent.

 

Consumption among the world's wealthy elites, and increasingly among the middle class, has in recent decades gone beyond satiating needs or fulfilling dreams to become an end in its own right, note State of the World 2004 project directors Lisa Mastny and Brian Halweil. At the same time, consumption is rising rapidly in the developing world, as globalization has introduced millions of people to consumer goods, while providing the technology and capital to produce and disseminate them.

 

"Nearly half of all global consumers now live in the developing world," says Mastny. "While the average Chinese or Indian consumes much less than the average North American or European, China and India alone now boast a combined consumer class larger than that in all of Western Europe."

 

Consumption is not in itself a bad thing, adds Halweil. "The almost three billion people worldwide who barely survive on less than $2 per day will need to ramp up their consumption in order to satisfy basic needs for food, clean water, and sanitation. And in China, the rush to meet surging consumer demand is stimulating the economy, creating jobs, and attracting foreign investment."

 

There is little evidence that the consumption locomotive is braking—particularly in the United States, where most people are amply supplied with the goods and services needed to lead a good life.

In the United States today, there are more private vehicles on the road than people licensed to drive them, the Worldwatch report points out. The average size of refrigerators in U.S. households increased by 10 percent between 1972 and 2001, and the number per home rose as well. New houses in the U.S. were 38 percent bigger in 2000 than in 1975, despite having fewer people in each household on average. As a result of these consumption patterns, the United States, with just 4.5 percent of the world's population, releases 25 percent of global carbon dioxide emissions.

 

Yet increased consumption has not brought Americans happiness. About a third of Americans report being "very happy," the same share as in 1957, when Americans were only half as wealthy. Americans are also some of the most overworked people in the industrial world, putting in the equivalent of nine more weeks on the job each year than the average European.

http://www.worldwatch.org/node/1785

………………………………………………………….

 

FOR MORE THAN ten years, I have been struggling to do my bit. Well, it's not really a struggle, since I grew up in the kuripot (thrifty) and environmentally-conscious city of Baguio.

 

I BUY all my clothes AND shoes AND bags (and my daughter's too) second hand from the thrift shops that sell used goods from Hong Kong--shops popularly known as wagwagan or ukay-ukay.

 

I also buy my books second hand, or read them straight out of Powerbooks on weekends, hehehe, when I don’t have budget to purchase. (Music is the one thing I wish I had money to purchase.)

 

I’ve stopped using a refrigerator for the years, yes, believe me, because I realized it wasn’t energy-effective with our family consisting of just my daughter and myself, and we’re always out of the house. But I admit, this gets to be a challenge in the sweltering tropical summer when you don’t only want to drink ice cold water, but bathe in it!

 

I don’t use an airconditioner at home, and when I’m the last at the office or doing overtime during the weekends, I always turn the aircon off.

 

I don’t wear make-up except for lipstick (sometimes), and I’m not into perfumes. My favorite scents are pine, cedar wood, beach air, damp soil, wet grass, lavender, citronella, floor wax and sun-dried laundry.

 

I don’t own a car, but again I admit, taking the public transpo can really be huge challenge in this overcrowded city, although I amuse myself with how stilettoed women can so deftly elbow each other for more room in a crowded MRT coach.

 

All in all, these lifestyle choices makes me a bit of an oddball in Makati (the central business district) where I work… and oh, by the way, I just hate Starbucks, hehehe, and think it’s really silly that some of my officemates would rack up huge credit card bills just so that they can have their daily cuppa overpriced joe that costs a 1/5, at least, of their daily wage.  

 

I also have a HUGE credit card bill, but it's made up of groceries during workless periods and interest -- I've turned the banking system into a social security net ... but that's another story altogether--

 

ONE of the things I hate about being a single mom, a working mom, though, is that my daughter and I eat at a half of our meals outside of the house, and – because I am a hypochondriac where hepatitis and typhoid is concerned – we end up eating at least 2x a week at, well, McDonald’s. Sure, there’s a lot of sidewalk fare along Manila’s city streets, but I won’t risk it. So taken together, our styropore consumption is quite high, which I try to cut down by bringing a reusable container to fast food shops where we eat—but watch the crew’s eyebrows shoot up when I request for my food to be placed in my own container.

………………………………………………………….

I actually feel proud of using second-hand clothes, and I think it’s quite silly and even a bit pathetic that Pinoys are such avid consumers—and that our economy is basically kept afloat by shopping. (Imagine that!)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/06/programmes_an_economy_in_crisis/html/10.stm

 

I never fail to be aghast at how deeply consumerist values have taken hold in this impoverished country, where garbage disposal, water pollution and similar issues are environmental issues of such huge scales!

http://www.terradaily.com/reports/Dozens_of_Philippine_rivers_destroyed_by_pollution_official_999.html

……………………………………………………………………

 

What I so long for is not a car, or a walk-in closet full of clothes, or the newest gadgets, but a garden where I can grow some flowers and herbs, where I can wake up to the sound of birds and a community where my daughter can safely bike to a school where she gets a good and relevant 21st century eduction.

 

But right now I’m stuck in the city where the jobs are, and where the consumerism I so thoroughly hate often seems to be the only way of life. 

 

By April 2010, when my daughter graduates from elementary school, I will change all that and make a drastic move closer to the life I long for. Mark my word.

 

 ……………………………………………………………………

P.S.

 

According to WorldWatch, the total amount of money spent worldwide for cosmetics in the United States reaches US $18 billion a year (2004 figures). Meanwhile, the total amount needed to fully end hunger and malnutrition reaches only US$19 billion a year. Overall expenditure for pets reaches US$17 billion a year, while the total amount of money needed to for all the world’s children to be fully covered by immunization programs, have access to clean water, and to be able to acquire basic literacy is estimated to cost US$16.3 billion.

http://www.demandmore.org/2006/09/19/consumerism-is-slavery/

 

"Everyone wants to eat like an American on this globe. But if they do, we’re going to need another two or three globes to grow it all."

DANIEL W. BASSE of the AgResource Company, a Chicago consultancy.

I missed the news, being busy with work and silly matters...

...................................

Arthur C. Clarke

Mar 27th 2008

From The Economist print edition

Sir Arthur C. Clarke, visionary, died on March 18th, aged 90

ALTHOUGH he dreamed and wrote about it constantly for 70 years, Arthur C. Clarke never voyaged into space. He came closest to visiting alien worlds through his love of deep-sea diving, its weightlessness and strange life forms. But he always looked upwards with a gleam in his eye, hoping for the real thing. “I can never look now at the Milky Way”, said the narrator in “The Sentinel”, “without wondering from which of those banked clouds of stars the emissaries are coming. If you will pardon so commonplace a simile, we have set off the fire alarm and have nothing to do but to wait. I do not think we will have to wait for long.”

http://www.economist.com/obituary/displaystory.cfm?story_id=10918055

All is fair in love and war.

Or it it?







In the blistering heat of a conflict, SOMEONE brought up my sex life. Uh, I mean my EX sex life, because boy have I been celibate for years.













Anyone, oh, anyone who has known me for the past decade will know that I have always lacked child care support, I have lugged my daughter around with me to interviews, to coverage, while putting newspapers to bed…So anything in my life frivolous, juicy, delicious or hot enough to be worthy of gossip, has to have happened a really long, long time ago.







But according to someone, I’m a “moral threat” to family and society.  Wow. This is not the first time I’ve been punished for having a sexuality. Makes me wonder why God created that little piece of  nerves down there ... was it meant to become like my appendix?




ALL this hullabaloo over humping and similar matters brought to fore the hypocrisy of Philippine society when it comes to sexuality. All these uptight sexual mores – especially among the middle class -- but in reality, heck, we’re 80+ million Pinoys and growing at a rate of 2+percent. Somebody’s gotta be getting it every minute. You do the math.







Pinoy’s concept of being a woman seems so outdated – almost like it stopped at 1898. It’s either you’re Ilaw ng Tahanan (The Light of the Home) – the ever-martyric mother who keeps the hearth, cries and suffers in silence, or Dragon Lady for women who get into power , or Tandang Sora, or Maria Clara (http://www.ladygadfly.com/blog/?p=192), or… a slut.







The ideal Pinay is powerless and sexless. And always puts herself last.







Makes me think that the Spanish friars who first came were actually shocked and threatened by our tropical sexuality so they proceeded to vigorously wipe it out and make Pinoys ashamed of it. After all, those bulitas (penile implants) were so common in prehispanic Philippines, read the historian William Henry Scott. His source couldn’t be any more objective – dictionaries of Tagalog terms collected by the first Spanish priests as they tried to communicate with those they sought to evangelize.







You can be a Viva Hot Babe, or a Margarita Lebumfacil Romualdez, or a Mareng Winnie Monsod, or a Cory Aquino. But no no no, not all of the above. If you have brains, you’re sexless. If you have any sort of sexual passion in you, you’re Viva Hot Babe.







And where men are concerned, the Pinoy husband goes home to his “clean” wife who does the dishes, keeps the home, takes care of the kids, and goes to the beerhouse if he wants something any racier than what he gets at home.  As my friends, college-educated, A-student, young Filipinas in their 20s, say – Why can’t the hubby just do that same things to the wife?!







And even where writers are concerned, Fiipina writers (in English) are so damned sanitized. Where’s the Filipina Erica Jong? Or playful Pinay Rimbaud? Or the female Dante full of gusto for life and all its offerings? Or the Filipino version of Shanghai Baby? Even Forbidden Fruit, the erotic book by women in the 1990s was a collection of careful offerings.







TWAS this kind of society that has forced me into frigidity for the past years. At 28, I realized that I had something important to say; I had my own voice as a writer and an advocate, but at some point I realized I wouldn’t be listened to or taken seriously if I kept on as the free spirit that I was.







So I just stopped being a sexual being. Cold turkey. Just like I quit smoking.







Now, 10 years later, I realize that this was tantamount to female circumcision.







I had this conversation of this sort once with my prettier and braver cousin, Marionne, who has always been brave about being on the edge, doing in-your-face things that have made our clan frown or squirm. Marionne, by the way, is also a mother and a Scrabble champion many times over.

"There is no Ibaloi word for vixen,” she mused. Neither is there a word for salacious, wanton, bawdy, sensual.













Or, as my friend Christian notes, sex in the country was seen  more as something that people HAD to do (propagate), rather than something that people would want to do.







I also found out once from my uncle that the punishment for the erring Ibaloi woman – banishment from the tribe – which, in early days was almost the same as death.







Enough of this now.  Just click on the links and make your own conclusions. And for my dear friend who dragged out the sexual skeletons from the closet, these images are dedicated to you.  Here's wishing you the best humping for the rest of your life!

 

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2008/01/20/magazine/20080120_CIRCUMCISION_SLIDESHOW_index.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Germaine_Greer

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simone_de_Beauvoir

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2002/08/18/IN237263.DTL

It's been a roller-coaster month, and I have much to worry about, and feel bitter about, and feel angry about, but I just keep in mind the Prophet's words:

.........................................


      
Then a woman said, "Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow."

And he answered:

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that hold your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."

But I say unto you, they are inseparable.

Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.

Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.

When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

Khalil Gibran 

I got a hypertension attack last week and I lost three days of my life (I think).

We came home on the night of Tuesday, to find that our water service was cut off.

It was well past 12pm, and I've been working late nights for many weeks (since April 7), with an occasional all-nighter dropped in (don't ask why), so there was nothing I could do until the morning.

I was mad --fuming mad -- because in the poor community (the infamous Nagpayong, Pasig) where my daughter and I live, several households tap from our water and electric service.

Mukha kasi kaming Instik (Filipino Chinese), and just because I'm the only one around with a regular paycheck, kami ang pinupuntahan, kahit di naman kami mayaman.

The last bill I paid for water was P1,500.--and we're only two, how many cubic liters does it take to bath twice a day? I'm short, by the way, so that really means less water consumption. And our lifestyle is to be always out! 9am-12 midnight, we're out. Often, we have our clothes laundered, because I have to work one extra day during weekdays to complete my work tasks.

But for many months I just agreed anyway to pay for everyone, because my neighbors are tricycle drivers and vendors, and my heart went out to them, struggling through their harsh lives.

Pero too much naman that even when I pay-- they hadn't been paying it to Manila Water pala for the past three months!

Now I had to pay surcharges + reconnection fee + the inconvenience of not having water! The total bill came to P3,700.

I've been so mad and there's no way to express it (apart from my matrona-like pagbubunganga), the blood pressure (I think) shot up and would not come down.

Up to Friday morning, we did not have water. And though I paid, the landlord did not take care of it immediately. We had to move around in different friends houses for three days-- and you can imagine how tough that is with a kid involved. And in between the constant headache...

I think I will finally, finally give up in my social experiment to live among the poor. I suppose I will still feel for them, advocate for them, but I can't allow myself to be victimized anymore!

..........................
We have our water back, but I'm so mad, mad, mad. I guess only ex-activists will understand the level of betrayal I feel.

..........................
It's called Horizontal Violence.

Horizontal violence is non physical inter group conflict and is manifested in overt and covert behaviors of hostility (Freire 1972; Duffy 1995). It is behavior associated with oppressed groups and can occur in any arena where there are unequal power relations, and one group's self expression and autonomy is controlled by forces with greater prestige, power and status than themselves (Harcombe 1999).

... such as the urban poor community I live in...

It may be conscious or unconscious behaviour (Taylor 1996). It is, generally, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually damaging behaviour and can have devastating long term effects on the recipients (Wilkie 1996). It may be overt or covert. It is generally non physical, but may involve shoving, hitting or throwing objects. It is one arm of the submissive/aggressive syndrome that results from an internalized self-hatred and low self esteem as a result of being part of an oppressed group (Glass 1997; Roberts 1996; MCCall 1995).

It is the inappropriate way oppressed people release built up tension when they are unable to address and solve issues with the oppressor.

(And it also happens in the workplace...)

In the majority of western cultures, a dominator model (Eisler 1993) of social organization enables workplace hierarchy to limit autonomy and practice of various groups of workers and therefore acts as an oppressive force.

Workers are socialized into the oppressive structures and unequal power relations of the workplace system. Some groups of people within each particular workplace unconsciously adopt inflated feelings and attitudes of superiority.

(Sound familiar also where I work)

Some groups adopt unconsciously submissive attitudes, learned helplessness, within the workplace. The internal conflict, generated by conforming to structural pressures and, in some, subduing the desire for autonomy, whilst over inflating it in other groups, compounds the self-hatred and low self esteem of certain groups of people and perpetuates the cycle of horizontal violence (Taylor 1996).

Horizontal Violence is a symptom of the dynamics around oppression and a sense of powerlessness. It is to the workplace culture like water is to fish. It molds, shapes and dictates the behavior of those within the workplace culture. It is a form of bullying and acts to socialize those who are different into the status quo.

(All artists are different)

Horizontal violence in the workplace is the result of history and politics in western society and the ideology and practices associated with the socialisation and stereotyping of males and females in western culture. Horizontal violence is a systems and cultural issue, a symptom of an emotionally, spiritually and psychologically toxic and oppressive environment. Horizontal violence is not a symptom of individual pathology, although individual pathology flourishes in a climate that supports and condones aggressive behavior.

Horizontal violence includes:

All acts of unkindness, discourtesy, sabotage, divisiveness, infighting, lack of cohesiveness, scapegoating and criticism

For example:

• Belittling gestures e.g. deliberate rolling of eyes, folding arms, staring into space when communication being attempted - Body language designed to discomfort the other
• Verbal abuse including name calling, threatening, intimidating, dismissing, belittling, undermining, humorous 'put downs'
• Gossiping (destructive, negative, nasty talk), talking behind the back, backbiting
• Sarcastic comments
• Fault finding (nitpicking) - different to those situations where professional and clinical development is required.
• Ignoring or minimizing another's concerns
• Slurs and jokes based on race, ethnicity, religion, gender or sexual orientation
• Sending to 'Coventry', 'freezing out' excluding from activities and conversation, work related and social.
• Comments that devalue:
  • people's area of practice;
  • women;
  • others that are different to the 'norm'.
• Disinterest, discouragement and withholding support
• Limiting right to free speech and right to have an opinion
• Behaviours which seek to control or dominate (power 'over' rather than power 'with')
• Elitist attitudes regarding work area, education, experience etc "better than" attitude
• Punishing activities by management e.g. Repeatedly sending someone out of area; bad rosters; chronic under staffing; lack of concern with mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health of employees
• Lack of participation in professional organisations (a subtle form of self-hatred) however, busy family lives can preclude participating in professional organizations.

grrr. now I'm MAD. MAD. MAD. So it's all interconnected and I'm MAD, MAD, MAD. I don't even want to look at some people for a while ----
I miss Uwe, we used to talk about things like this

And take a look, it's widespread---
http://nursinghole.blogspot.com/2007/01/horizontal-violence.html

Sexual assault is an incredibly personal and destructive crime.  Its effects on victims and their loved ones can be felt psychologically, emotionally, and physically.  They can be brief in duration or last a very long time.  It is important to remember that there is no one “normal” reaction to sexual assault. Every individual's response will be different depending on the situation. In this section, we have explained some of the more common effects that a victim may experience. View one of the pages below to learn more about the effects a victim may experience.

..........................................................................................................
Those words above are not original, but an excerpt from the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. As part of my (extended) women's month series, I thought it was very important to make a post about rape.

Several times in my life-- too many, I believe -- I have been called to witness (not legally) on the issue. And on each occasion I never fail to be aghast at how the victim is always victimized again by society.

Remember, rape is not about sex. It's about power.
..........................................................................................................
Some fast facts: (though this are American figures, there is a similar trend anywhere in the world)

1 out of every 6 American women have been the victims of an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime (14.8% completed rape; 2.8% attempted rape).

17.7 million American women have been victims of attempted or completed rape.

9 of every 10 rape victims were female in 2003.

15% of sexual assault and rape victims are under age 12.

• 29% are age 12-17.
• 44% are under age 18.
• 80% are under age 30.
• 12-34 are the highest risk years.
• Girls ages 16-19 are 4 times more likely than the general population to be victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault.

..........................................................................................................

Victims of sexual assault are:

3 times more likely to suffer from depression.
6 times more likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.
13 times more likely to abuse alcohol.
26 times more likely to abuse drugs.
4 times more likely to contemplate suicide.

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The Rapist isn't a Masked Stranger

Almost 2/3 of rapes were committed by someone known to the victim.
73% of sexual assaults were perpetrated by a non-stranger.
38% of rapists are a friend or acquaintance.
28% are an intimate.
7% are a relative.

He's not Hiding in the Bushes

More than 50% of all rape/sexual assault incidents were reported by victims to have occured within 1 mile of their home or at their home.

• 4 in 10 take place at the victim's home.
• 2 in 10 take place at the home of a friend, neighbor, or relative.
• 1 in 12 take place in a parking garage.

43% of rapes occur between 6:00pm and midnight.

• 24% occur between midnight and 6:00am.
• The other 33% take place between 6:00am and 6:00pm.

The Criminal

• The average age of a rapist is 31 years old.
• 52% are white.
• 22% of imprisoned rapists report that they are married.
• Juveniles accounted for 16% of forcible rape arrestees in 1995 and 17% of those arrested for other sex offenses.
• In 1 in 3 sexual assaults, the perpetrator was intoxicated — 30% with alcohol, 4% with drugs.
• In 2001, 11% of rapes involved the use of a weapon — 3% used a gun, 6% used a knife, and 2 % used another form of weapon.
• 84% of victims reported the use of physical force only.

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What Can Men Do?

While individuals of both genders are perpetrators of sexual assault, the majority of those who commit sexual assaults are men. Even so, it is important to remember that the vast majority of men are not rapists.

There are many things men (and women) can do to help prevent sexual violence.

If you see someone in danger of being assaulted:

• Step in and offer assistance. Ask if the person needs help. NOTE: Before stepping in, make sure to evaluate the risk. If it means putting yourself in danger, call 911 instead.
• Don’t leave. If you remain at the scene and are a witness, the perpetrator is less likely to do anything.
• If you know the perpetrator, tell him or her that you do not approve of what s/he is doing. Ask him or her to leave the potential victim alone.

Be an ally:

• When you go to a party, go with a group of friends. Arrive together, check in with each other frequently and leave together.
• Have a buddy system. Don’t be afraid to let a friend know if you are worried about her/his safety.
• If you see someone who is intoxicated, offer to call him or her a cab.

If someone you know has been assaulted:

*Listen. Be there. Don’t be judgmental.

* Be patient. Remember, it will take your friend some time to deal with the crime.

*Help to empower your friend or family member. Sexual assault is a crime that takes away an individual’s power, it is important not to compound this experience by putting pressure on your friend or family member to do things that he or she is not ready to do yet.

* Encourage your friend to report the rape to law enforcement (call 911 in most areas). If your friend has questions about the criminal justice process, talking with someone on the National Sexual Assault Hotline, 1-800-656-HOPE can help.

* Let your friend know that professional help is available through the National Sexual Assault Hotline, 1-800-656-HOPE and the National Sexual Assault Online Hotline (LINK TO: /ohl-bridge.php).

* If your friend is willing to seek medical attention or report the assault, offer to accompany them wherever they need to go (hospital, police station, campus security, etc.)

* Encourage him or her to contact one of the hotlines, but realize that only your friend can make the decision to get help.

Changing the culture:

There are certain things in our culture that make sexual assault more possible. By speaking out and educating ourselves and others, we can help to decrease the number of sexual assaults.

http://www.rainn.org/
http://www.rainn.org/get-information/effects-of-sexual-assault1
http://www.rainn.org/get-information/types-of-sexual-assault/was-it-rape
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Accused_%281988_film%29

It's still Women's Month, as far as I'm concerned...

...............................

Here's an interview of Christiane Nüsslein-Volhard by Ruby Washington/The New York Times; published: July 4, 2006.

If a list were made of the great biologists of the past 100 years, Christiane Nüsslein-Volhard would certainly be on it.

In the 1980s, she and Eric F. Wieschaus solved one of the central mysteries of life: how the genes in a fertilized egg direct the formation of an embryo. For their discovery, Dr. Nüsslein-Volhard, Dr. Wieschaus and Edward B. Lewis received the 1995 Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine. Dr. Nüsslein-Volhard was just the 10th woman to win a Nobel Prize in one of the sciences.

Now 63, she directs the Max Planck Institute for Developmental Biology in Tübingen, Germany. In her off-hours, she works to improve the status of women in science.

With her own money and a $100,000 award from Unesco-L'Oréal's Women in Science Program, she has organized the Christiane Nüsslein-Volhard Foundation, which offers grants to young female scientists for baby sitters and household help.

Dr. Nüsslein-Volhard was in New York last month to talk about her Kales Press book "Coming to Life: How Genes Drive Development ."

Q. Grants for baby sitters and housecleaners? Is this the kind of foundation a male Nobel Prize winner could have thought of?

A. No one thought of it! (Laughs) Not even non-Nobel prize winners!
I am often asked why there is discrimination against women in science. And I have given it some thought. With prejudicial attitudes, you can't really do much. You can point out when people discriminate and ask them not to. At the Max Planck Institute, we made a little pamphlet telling the men when they do it, because they often don't know.

In German science, we have a special problem. We lose talented women at the time they get pregnant. Some of it occurs because they are encouraged — by their husbands, bosses and the government — to take long maternity leaves.

Germanic thinking has it that children can only be properly brought up if the actual mother is cleaning and picking up. Many stop their research for two or three years. Later, these young women find it difficult to get back. They drop out.

Q. And how does a $400-a-month grant plug a brain drain?

A. We try to find the gifted ones, where it would be a real pity if they dropped out. We say: use these funds to buy yourself time away from household matters. We still expect they'll work full-time and get day care for the kids. This is meant to ease the extra workload they have because of children.

Q. Did you experience gender bias when you were a student?

A. I didn't have children. But when I finished my doctoral thesis, it was published and I was only listed as the second author. The boss at the laboratory where I worked said: "Let this man be first author. He started the project and has family, and he needs his career."
I had done almost all the work. And yet, I agreed! I could still foam: I get so angry about it.

Q. Did you foam last year when Lawrence Summers, then the president of Harvard, suggested that women were less likely to have "an intrinsic aptitude" for scientific careers?

A. He missed the point. In mathematics and science, there is no difference in the intelligence of men and women. The difference in genes between men and women is simply the Y chromosome, which has nothing to do with intelligence.

What troubles me is that some might think: "Well, if the president of Harvard says this, it must be true. He's just being attacked because he said something politically incorrect." What Summers said was scientifically incorrect.

Q. When you made your Nobel discovery, was there a moment when you felt: "Aha, I have changed what humans know about nature?"

A. At the time we did the experiments, Eric Wieschaus and I knew the work was important. Nonetheless, one always struggles with whether the experiment is right.

Q. Can you describe your Nobel experiments in lay terms?

A. We first bred a large number of fruit fly families where just one gene was absent. If an embryo did not develop a head or a gut, we could then say, "This gene is important for the shape of a head or a gut." In our first published paper, we described 20 or so "control genes" affecting the subdivision of the embryo's body into regions. Using what were then newly developed technologies, we and others then isolated the genes.
We figured out what they did biochemically and how they interacted.

The sum was: We developed a detailed understanding of how an embryo's shape is determined by genes. We found many of these genes were similar to those implicated in human genetic diseases. This was not anticipated by us but was important for the Nobel Prize, I think.

Q. Your country is being led by a Ph.D. physicist. Do you think Chancellor Angela Merkel's election has improved the status of German women in science?

A. It might be of influence. I am happy that she is there because she understands science outside of ideology. In the Green Party and among some in the Socialist Party, there are people who are anti-science. They are against genetically modified foods and atomic energy. She sees through it, and maybe this will help.
Another thing, we have since 1990 this Embryo Protection Law, which says that eggs are human beings from the time of fertilization. Cells in a Petri dish are considered the same as a full human!

Q. Is Germany's embryo-protection law a reaction to the pseudo-science of the Nazi period when physicians performed experiments on concentration camp prisoners?

A. It's probably the reason why German research laws are so restrictive — just to be on the "safe" side. If the people don't understand stem cells or gene diagnosis, they say, "Let's make laws that make it impossible that something bad can happen."

Q. You were born in 1942. Did you ever speak with your parents about their activities in the Nazi years?

A. Nearly everyone in my age group had those conversations with their teachers — though often the parents would not speak about it. In my family, we talked. They were not heroes, but it was O.K. They were not in the Nazi Party. My grandfather was dismissed from his job because he was not in the party. Also, he hid Jews. And one aunt was put in a concentration camp.

One of my colleagues is a nephew of Dietrich Bonhoeffer [the anti- Hitler resistance leader]. What we observed, with consternation, is the way people tried to live normal lives.

When you read letters between my mother and father while he was at the front, it's about where to get food and knitting a pullover for "Little Janni." After the war, my mother was in a group of women with Emmi Bonhoeffer [Bonhoeffer's sister-in-law].
They helped refugees from Auschwitz give testimony against those who ran the concentration camps. My mother told us there were things from that time she felt awful about and she had to do some good.

Q. It's often said that artistic work and scientific inquiry are similar. Do you find it so?

A. Yes and no. It is certainly a creative act to understand phenomena in nature. But after some time, scientific discoveries no longer depend on the personality of the scientist. Whoever discovered the double helix, it is true. It doesn't matter whether Watson and Crick discovered it, or Rosalind Franklin. Yet, no matter how much time passes, Mozart is still Mozart.

Q. Every article I've read about you mentions that you bake an incredible chocolate cake. Why is that?

A. It's true! They want to make sure "she's still a woman." There is terrible prejudice against women who are successful. If she's beautiful, she must be stupid. And if a woman is smart, she must be ugly — or nasty. I think it makes some people feel better to learn I bake good chocolate cake.

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caption: Christiane Nüsslein-Volhard in the Hall of Biodiversity at the Museum of Natural History.  Photo copyright of the New York Times.

 

The best thing about this, is that, while it's not original, l received it on the mail from my aunt...ibig sabihin, I'm a phenomenal woman in her eyes. Hehehe.

So here -- something light naman:

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WHY I LOVE MOM

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed"
 
She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches.
Rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning.

She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button

She picked up the game pieces left on the table, put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer.

She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry.
 
She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a text book out from hiding under the chair.
 
She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse.
 
Mom then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night solution & age fighting moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails.
 
Dad called out, "I thought you were going to bed."
 
"I'm on my way," she said.
 
She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked and the patio light was on.
 
She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside lamps and TV's, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework.

In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her 6 most important things to do list She said her prayers, and visualized the accomplishment of her goals.
 
About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular. "I'm going to bed."
 
And he did...without another thought.
 
Anything extraordinary here? Wonder why women live longer...?
 
CAUSE WE ARE MADE FOR THE LONG HAUL..... (and we can't die sooner, we still have things to do!!!!)
 
Send this to five phenomenal women today...they'll love you for it! I just did.
 
THEN, GO TO BED!

By Vinia Datinguinoo
Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism
July 1998

Photo by Luis Liwanag

http://luisliwanag.multiply.com/photos/album/53/Happy_land_Ulingan#4

Bonglo, Bordon, Cebu—JOSEFINA Flores is only 40 years old, but she looks at least a decade older. Thin and gaunt, the mother of six seems in no condition to do even the least of her daily chores at her farm here in this mountain barangay, about 80 kilometers from Cebu City.

But she does them all, and beginning at the crack of dawn until late evening, Josefina is in constant motion. She starts the day with a two-kilometer trek to fetch water, and continues on to cooking meals, gathering and selling firewood, making charcoal, cleaning the house, looking after the children and her husband, and seeing to it that everyone in the family has something to eat.

Of all her chores, it is the last that Josefina is finding hardest to do these days. Hunger is a familiar feeling in Bongdo-a community of nearly 400 families-as it is in many other poor farming communities elsewhere. But in this prolonged season of El Niño, the situation has gone from bad to worse, and there has been even less food here to go around. And the mothers, as usual, are having it toughest.

"Life has been hard," says Josefina in Cebuano. "But there must be something that my husband and children could eat. If there's any left, then that's what I eat."
Every year, the National Nutrition Council declares July as 'Nutrition Month' in the hope that some attention, however short-term, would be given to the kind of diet Filipinos should have. But the annual event seems to have become a mockery in places like Bongdo, where there is almost no food to be had, and where the women are especially unlikely to ever be in good health because of malnutrition, if not sheer hunger.

To be sure, health workers would be hard pressed in finding any Bongdo resident-male or female-in sound health today. After all, Bongdo is among the areas that have been declared to be in a state of calamity by the Cebu Sangguniang Panglungsod because of the drought, and people here now count themselves lucky if they had at least corn lugaw to eat.

But it is the mothers who have it worst, because, say nutrition experts, "culture" dictates that they eat last-and often risk eating nothing at all.

This is a practice not unique to Bongdo. "Kung isda ang ulam, yung pinaghimayan niyan na halos tinik na lang, yun ang sa nanay (If the viand is fish, then the mother usually gets to eat whatever is left clinging on the bones)," says nutrition anthropologist Catherine Castañeda, who did a 1994 study on how food is distributed in Filipino dining tables.
The explanation goes something like this: The father should have something, because he's the "breadwinner." And the children should have something, too, because they are children. As for the mother, Castañeda notes: "She's the one that is expected to make the sacrifice."

But such a sacrifice exacts a heavy toll on the women's health, making them weaker in the long term.

Women menstruate, get pregnant, lactate, and give birth-activities that take so much out of them that there is need for the women to slow down, space births and eat well in order to regain their lost energy. But before they can even recover from giving birth, women in poor communities often get pregnant all too soon. There is also no slowing down because there is simply too much they have to do. And eating well is out of the question for most of these women.

The result is that anemia, for example, remains a very pronounced health problem among women. The 1993 National Nutrition Survey found that 43 percent of pregnant Filipino women were anemic. This is higher than the 40 percent cut-off set by the World Health Organization for mild and moderate anemia in that population group.
Other nutrient shortfalls among women are being found survey after survey, among them deficiencies in iodine, protein-energy, vitamin A, thiamin, and riboflavin. Goiter, which manifests iodine deficiency, is most prevalent among women than in men, in all age groups.

Experts have said malnutrition makes women susceptible to disease, exacerbates fatigue, and reduces their capacity in the workplace and at home. It is also particularly dangerous for pregnant women.

The irony is that these same women are made almost solely responsible for the health and nutrition of the rest of the family. Says Castañeda, who is with the Food and Nutrition Research Institute (FNRI), which monitors malnutrition in the country: "When you talk of a nutrition program the priority is always the mother and the child. And when you talk of the mother, you talk of the needs of the mother and how they relate to the nutrition of the family." Always, she says, the state of nutrition of children is dependent on the mothers.

The United Nations Children's Fund (UNICEF) has also said that women are key to guarding children's nutrition, and that ill health in women often translates to not being able to take care of the children properly.

There is even a term nutrition experts use: "maternal time allocation," which measures the time a mother spends on her duties that include work, child care and child feeding. As for the fathers, Castañeda says, "walang pakialam iyan (they couldn't care less)."
She does say, though, that fathers are now attending government-sponsored "mother's classes," where they are lectured on their role in caring for their children. That's why, she says, there are now fathers sharing the burden of monitoring the children's nutrition and general well being, though still "the exception more than the rule."

Such lectures may also be lacking in listeners today in places like this farmingcommunity, where people would much rather spend their time looking for food than discussing balanced diets. What had been a three-month dry season has stretched drastically to the current nine-and still counting-and people can now see clear across fields where rows and rows of corn stalks had once obstructed their view.

"Dakong kausaban (There's a very big difference)," says Pelagia Olivares, 45, when asked if life has been the same after El Niño. And she does not just speak of the springs drying up, making them hike longer trails to find other sources of water.

Befor